A double update.
For lunch today I went to this burger place I've been wanting to go to for a while. I finally had a nice, American style big burger, with bacon, and a couple beers, and was very satisfied.
Picture 1: Last night my department had a BBQ at our manager's house. You don't even know how hot hot is until you're sitting outside, in Osaka, and cooking on a hellish grill for a bunch of people from work. But that is neither here nor there. Of course, at the end came karoake. This dude was absolutely horrible, but sang with gusto, so big ups. This one girl was absolutely ridic, and big ups, in a different way. She was like a fucking professional singer.
Q: What is the greatest Japanese invention?
A: No, not bukkake. Not Nintendo either. Love hotels.
Let me school you on love hotels.
Picture 2: k so you walk in with hopefully an attractive, DTF girl on your arm, and you won't see a goddamn soul. You'll see a picture board like this, which will have pictures of each room, with the going rate. You can either stay for the night, which is usually something like 10pm-10am, or you can "rest," for an hourly fee. Press the button for the corresponding room, and you'll get a printed ticket, like you're waiting in line for a sandwich at the deli.
This one room at this hotel near work I want to stay at has a fucking pool inside the room. It is quite expensive though, so we'll have to save that for a special occasion, like The Tiz.
Picture 3: Some nights the hotel will be full like the birthing canal of a woman giving birth. Like last night, since there was a big festival. There are these little waiting spaces with a sofa and TV, so you and your slunt can get ready. You may be thinking, "Yasu, that looks like a great place to just chill. Why don't you just go there and knock back a couple to kill some time?" There are cameras like a casino, and unless the hotel is full, they will kick you out quicker than DeSha'uan at a Klan Kovention.
Picture 4: Take the elevator up to whatever floor, and a gentle flashing light will alert you to which room you're supposed to go to.
MANNER TIP: If there is another couple waiting for the elevator, do not go in with them.
If you're planning to spend the night, you need pay up front, using this machine right inside the room. Japan is largely a cash based society so you do not need to worry about your wife looking at your credit card statements and finding some questionable charges.
Picture 5: This room I kept it real at last night was pretty sweet. $150, and was for four people, but I was a bit krunk, so did not realize that at the time. Most hotel rooms will have a big TV with a selection of porn (though in Japan the fun parts are blurred out, so how the fuck is that porn?) and karaoke. And regular movies too. But honestly, why would you come to a love hotel and watch movies?
Picture 6: Having two beds was nice, because when one bed was you know... you could switch.
Picture 7: Everything, lights, a/c, music, and TV, is controlled through this control panel next to the bed.
Picture 8: The bathrooms feature everything you need for a pleasant stay, from toothbrushes, to contact lens cases and solution, face wash, whatever. A couple hotels have this mousse which is just ridic and makes me look like a fucking YouTube star, and at every drugstore and convenience store I've looked for it, but nobody sells it. You might be thinking, "Yasu, why don't you just jack the mousse next time?" Well, I have definitely considered that, but they don't have a fucking cap to prevent that from happening, and the can is such a weird shape that I can't bring a cap from something else to smuggle it out without getting mousse everywhere.
Picture 9: Only the worst hotels will not have a TV in the bathroom. This tub was rather large though.
Picture 10: Peace.
